Do you find it hard to feel confident and comfortable in your body?

You’re certainly not alone.

In a world inundated with harmful beauty standards, it’s challenging to foster a genuine love for ourselves. True confidence and comfort with our bodies are rooted not in surface-level changes but in the profound inner work we do. In this post, I’ll share seven transformative tips to help you feel better in your body and—most importantly—feel confident in your body!

Our relationship with our bodies can cause us so much insecurity and angst.

The societal beauty standard inevitably lead to insecurity and turmoil. This stems from the relentless barrage of toxic messages aimed at making us believe that the way we look is not enough. Such beliefs negatively impact our relationships, self-esteem, engagement with life, and overall relationship with ourselves—essentially touching every aspect of our lives.

I firmly believe that to truly embrace our beauty, we must nurture our relationship with ourselves. When we do, we can step into any environment with grace, confidence, and a sense of belonging in our own skins.

Here are seven empowering ways to reclaim your body confidence, silence the inner critic, and truly feel beautiful.

 

Table of contents

1. 1. Introduction
   2. 7 Tips to Feel Better in Your Body…
   3. Tip 1. Recognize the “Beauty Load Brainwash”
   4. Tip 2. Give Yourself Permission to Feel Beautiful
   5. Tip 3. Practice Self-Gratitude
   6. Tip 4. Build a “Beauty Feeling” Practice
   7. Tip 5. Stop Seeing Yourself from Negative External Eyes
   8. Tip 6. Surround Yourself with Positive Messages
   9. Tip 7. Explore your presumptions, beliefs and relationship with beauty
   10. Conclusion
   11. FAQs…
   12. But, I am not pretty, what do I do?
   13. Why do I not feel beautiful?
   14. Why do I feel uglier than normal?
   15. Is it normal to not feel beautiful?
   16. Why do I feel uncomfortable being called beautiful?
   17. How to explore this further

7 Tips to Feel Better in Your Body and More Beautiful

 

 

01
Recognize the “Beauty Load Brainwash”

Our consumer-driven society thrives on making us feel insecure about our bodies, creating a constant urge to spend money on fleeting beauty solutions. There is a pervasive, targeted message pushing women to feel “not enough.”

By recognising it, we start to understand that this widespread conditioning is not personal and not our fault, we can reclaim our power. Seeing these societal pressures for what they are can foster self-compassion, allowing us to confront insecurities with understanding rather than self-criticism. This awareness will lead you to discover your authentic beauty and help you regain control over your self-perception.

 

02
Give Yourself Permission to Feel Beautiful

This step sounds simple, but it’s often the hardest.

In a world that dictates beauty through narrow standards, granting yourself permission to feel beautiful can feel like a rebellious act. So many of us believe we only deserve to feel beautiful if we adhere to each arbitrary standard—which is exhausting and often unachievable, as these standards are ever-changing.

We often fill our minds with negative self-talk, thinking things like “My ___ is too big,” or “My ___ looks awkward.” This type of thinking only fuels further insecurity and self-criticism. Beauty confidence  comes from acceptance.

You can decide to accept your own beauty. You are not beholden to anyone else’s definitions—you create your own. Look in the mirror and affirm, “This is me, and I am enough.”

 

03
Practice Self-Gratitude

One of the most effective ways to improve how you feel in your body is by cultivating gratitude for all the incredible things it does for you. Spend a moment in front of the mirror to thank your body for each of its remarkable qualities—your legs that empower movement, your hands that allow you to express love. Gradually begin to appreciate those parts you may not particularly love yet, even the quirks you tend to criticize. By focusing on gratitude, you actively reshape your self-image in positive ways.

 

04
Build a “Beauty Feeling” Practice

Beauty is more than the way we look on the surface; it’s an experience that brings a lovely, pleasurable feeling…. and that feeling comes from within. 

If you want to feel more beautiful, try spending a few minutes each day building this feeling from the inside out. 

Sit quietly, breathe deeply, and tune into your heart. Notice what it feels like to be present with yourself in this moment in your body. Now imagine what it feels like to trust your beauty and feel confident and relaxed in your own skin. Now let that sensation grow. Start with practicing this for just two minutes a day, and you’ll gradually build this feeling. Over time, it will become easier to carry this feeling with you throughout your day and to consciously invite the feeling in when you need it.

 

05
Stop Seeing Yourself from Negative External Eyes

 In our culture, especially with the rise of social media we have become so used to worrying about how other people view us that it has distorted the way we perceive ourselves. We start to see ourselves as if from external eyes, through a critical lens crafted from the opinions of authority figures and societal norms.

It is as though we have disassociated from the internal experience of our body and we are outside of ourselves looking back through the critical judging eyes of some pieced-together authority figure (part-mum, part-teacher, part-cool-mean-girl) and all we can see are our faults.

This external perception can subject us to harsh judgment.

Instead, draw your attention inward. Focus on how it feels to be you, and embrace the physical sensations of being present in your body. Practice seeing yourself as if through the loving eyes of your heart.

 

06
Surround Yourself with Positive Messages

You have undoubtedly been bombarded by negativity regarding your appearance throughout your life. Now, it’s time to counterbalance that with uplifting messages.

• Spend time with people who uplift and inspire you.
• Follow accounts on social media that promote empowerment and beauty in diverse forms; unfollow those that make you feel inadequate.
• Immerse yourself in books, films, and podcasts that celebrate self-acceptance and body positivity.

If you’re seeking inspiration, you can check out my curated Beauty Load list  for recommendations.

 

07
Explore your Presumptions, Beliefs and Relationship with Beauty

The way we feel about our looks and our bodies has been imposed upon us by cultural messaging and advertising. 

There is so much to unpack, explore and unlearn in all the ways we think and believe in relation to our bodies. Immersing yourself in this exploration can help liberate you from the insecurity and angst you feel around your body image. My book offers a deep dive with insights, stories and AHA moments that will help you on your own journey of finding confidence and acceptance of your body.

The perceptions you hold about your appearance stems from societal pressures and cultural messaging.

There’s so much to unpack regarding how we think and feel about our bodies. Engaging in this exploration can liberate you from the insecurities and negative feelings you have surrounding your body image. My book, “The Beauty Load: How to Feel Enough in a World Obsessed with Beauty”, is a great resource filled with insights, stories, and transformative moments that can assist you on your journey toward body acceptance and confidence.

 

So, how do I feel more beautiful?

In essence, the most impactful methods of feeling beautiful do not involve superficial tweaks and tucks as we have always been encouraged, but come from changing the relationship you have with your body, your beauty and the messages you have absorbed over your lifetime.

We need to recognize these messages and standards for what they are—by-products of the patriarchy and consumerist culture that thrive on you feeling small—and remind yourself that you get to define beauty and how you feel about your body, for yourself. 

The practices I’ve shared are not quick fixes. They require patience, exploration, and self-nurturing to develop into meaningful, lasting transformations. However, the investment is invaluable. Engaging in this deeper work paves the way for enduring change as you navigate life in your one body in a world increasingly focused on beauty and youth.

 

FAQ’s on how to feel more beautiful

Here are some common questions that I often receive, along with my responses that may resonate with your own experiences.
 
But I don’t feel pretty; what should I do?

You might think, “But I am not pretty!” and while that may reflect society’s narrow standards, it doesn’t have to define your worth. Instead of criticizing yourself further, extend compassion to the parts of you that feel uncomfortable. I offer a course called “From Insecurity to Body Confidence,” which guides you toward embracing a compassionate approach to body image. Remember, beauty standards are subjective, and you have the power to create your own.
 
Why don’t I feel beautiful?

True beauty is not about physical perfection; it’s about experiencing joy and wonder. It deeply relates to how you feel within yourself. By practicing self-acceptance and gratitude, you’ll discover the unique qualities that make you beautiful, shifting your focus away from societal comparisons. Seeking support through therapy can also be immensely beneficial in this journey.
 
Why do I feel uglier than usual?

Feeling “uglier than usual” is often a reflection of our emotional state rather than our actual appearance. Factors such as stress, lack of sleep, or hormonal fluctuations can exacerbate negative self-perceptions. It’s essential to recognize that even with self-acceptance practices and work, there will be days when insecurities flare up. In those moments, take a breath, move your body, and focus on something that you do find beautiful about yourself.
 
Is it normal to not feel beautiful?

Absolutely. Many people, regardless of their appearance, experience moments of insecurity and self-doubt. Life, hormones, and societal pressures can make it difficult to feel beautiful consistently. Learn to be kind to yourself and redirect your focus to what makes you feel good. This shift can significantly enhance your overall sense of beauty.
 
Why do I feel uncomfortable being called beautiful?

It’s common to feel discomfort when receiving compliments. Often, this discomfort arises from not trusting those compliments amid toxic beauty standards, or it may touch on our insecurities. Accepting compliments can feel vulnerable, but it can also serve as a powerful act of rebellion against societal pressures. Start small by responding with a simple “thank you.” And remember, the more you accept your own beauty, the more you empower others to do the same.
 
What steps can I take to feel more beautiful?

The seven tips outlined above are effective pathways to reconnect with your beauty and reclaim your sense of body confidence. If you’re eager to delve deeper and genuinely feel “enough” in a world that demands unattainable beauty standards, check out my book, “The Beauty Load: How to Feel Enough in a World Obsessed with Beauty”. It’s filled with insights, stories, and reflective prompts to assist you on your journey towards body confidence and self-acceptance.